Lately I’ve been hearing the same sentiment from women in relationships about their sexual desire. The battle cry is, “I need to jumpstart my sex drive.” or “my sex drive is asleep and I need to awaken it!” This at least reveals that some women are aware that their sexuality is important and it’s important for their relationship.

Women have been led to believe that sexual desire precedes sexual activity when in actual fact, arousal often precedes sexual desire especially in the longer term relationships which is anything longer than two years. Once women realize that this linear sexual response is not reliable, they can understand why things hadn’t been working the way they thought they should.

That said, if your sex live needs a reboot, a little support may be required in getting the juices flowing, the arousal going. This begins with a little self exploration. It’s important ladies to know yourself, explore your body and learn what feels good. According to research about 85% of women self-stimulate so next time you do, make sure you get naked first. This in and of itself is arousing. Touch yourself, feel the sensations, explore and learn what feels good.

In addition to feeling good, self-stimulation revitalizes body tissues and releases emotional tension. Masturbation may help you to increase your arousal to a higher level and experience orgasm and/or increase the pleasure or intensity of an orgasm. Pleasuring yourself is helpful if your partner is on a different sexual rhythm and not only meets your sexual needs, you will be able to communicate to your partner what feels good. Masturbation is healthy, normal and beneficial both physically and emotionally ladies. If you can’t touch yourself, who can you touch?

Be comfortable in your own skin and strut your stuff! Naked, of course. The next time you make love with your partner, walk in the room naked. Well ok, naked with the exception of some hot pink pumps perhaps. I was in a store recently and a guy had picked up a size 7 hot pink strappy pump from the sale section to show to his girlfriend. The shoes were too small for her but fortunately were just my size! Know what you want ladies and go after it!

Consider, doing your household chores with nothing on and celebrate! Pay bills at your desk in the buff! Fantasize, it’s fun! Conduct your business in your birthday suit! You might want to stop short of answering the door for the delivery man in the buff unless of course it’s a fantasy fulfilled. Dream on ladies! It’s arousing indeed!

Almost naked works too. You don’t want to wear too much which is why a G-String may be perfect. G-string panties are naturally arousing as they gently press against your clitoris. The tighter the G-string, the more pressure applied. You get it.

In order to be comfortable in your skin and strut your stuff in pumps, obviously you must be comfortable with your body. This calls for my “Get Naked Diet.” Make a commitment to cutting out sugar, alcohol, carbohydrates and process foods. The “Get Naked Diet” is a lifestyle change to health, clean eating; high protein, low carb, water, low glycemic fruits and vegetables.

Eating this way will increase your energy levels, improve your mood and help you to sleep better. Fatigue is the number one reason for low sexual desire and will no longer plague your sexual response. This Get Naked Plan may also reduce pain because of the elimination of the inflammatory agent sugar from your diet.

Exercise is important too as not only does it aid in flexibility, it increases serotonin levels, improving mood and overall wellness. You can sure exercise in the buff in the privacy of your own home which may increase arousal also! If you feel good, you can’t help but look good. I’m not suggesting that only thin bodies are sexy, rather that women with confidence in their bodies are the sexiest bodies. Keep in mind, your physical, emotional and spiritual health are tied to your sex life.

So celebrate your body, get naked, touch yourself, fantasize and strut your stuff back to the bedroom ladies! You’ll be glad you did. Oh and one more thing…..no marriage is perfect and you will have conflict, so remember settle all marital arguments in the bedroom…..NAKED!

Maureen McGrath is a women’s health expert and hosts the Sunday Night Sex Show on News Talk 980 CKNW. She is creator of the blog 50ShadesofPink.ca and has a clinical practice in North Vancouver, British Columbia. She is an expert in the Sexless Marriage. Her TEDx talk on the matter has received close to 5 million views in one year.

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Maureen McGrath

Maureen McGrath

Host of the CKNW Sunday Night Health Show on Corus Radio. As a leading women's health expert and Registered Nurse, I understand the importance that sexual, vaginal, bladder and bowel health has on overall health and relationships.

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