Dear Maureen,
Thank you for your sex radio program the Sunday Night Sex Show on News Talk 980 CKNW.
I am a 58 year old woman. Intercourse with my husband is becoming painful and so my libido has gone down. I feel like the opening to my vagina has become smaller making it much more difficult for my husband’s penis to make the initial penetration into my vagina. I have been told that I have vaginal atrophy but I don’t want to use anything with estrogen in it due to my history of breast cancer.
Thanks for any help you can offer.
Beth
Dear Beth,
What you are experiencing is very common for women during or after the menopausal years. You see, estrogen is the hormone regulator of the vagina which accounts for a woman’s natural lubrication. When the estrogen levels in the vagina decrease as they do in menopause, vaginal dryness may set in and it is very uncomfortable! The normally elastic tissues become tight making penetration difficult. The tissues may become thin, dry and lose elasticity. The vaginal tissues literally atrophy or “dry up.” It can wreak havoc on a woman’s sex life.
If you are uncomfortable with estrogen to treat your vaginal health issues, not to worry. There are a number of hormone-free personal moisturizers that I would recommend. The one I would recommend for you is Gynatrof because in addition to the fact that it does not contain hormones, it has been approved for the treatment of vaginal atrophy and is easily absorbed in the vaginal tissues. It also can be used as a lubricant during sex making penetration much easier. Rubbing Gynatrof on your husbands penis while you kiss, lick and suckle it is a nice form of foreplay. Men love that because they view it as the ultimate expression of female love. Add to that your saliva provides further natural lubrication for when he penetrates you.
For the smaller opening to your vagina, I might incorporate vaginal dilators into my regime. They come in graduated set of about six dilators ranging from a small size to larger sizes. Start with the smallest one and remember to use Gynatrof when you insert. Use the smallest one for about one- two weeks in a circular motion stretching the opening to your vagina. Then move on to the next size up. If the next size hurts then go back to the smaller size.
The Gynatrof will take about 2-3 months to optimize which is also the time it will take to “stretch” the opening to your vagina. It is difficult to relax during sex after you have had pain but remember being fully vulnerable during intimate times is key.
With this nice triple play (dilators, Gynatrof, oral sex) and a chat with your doctor you will soon be on the road back to the bedroom with your husband!
Maureen McGrath is a Registered Nurse host of the Sunday Night Sex Show on News Talk 980 CKNW, feminist, women’s health expert and a 2016 TED speaker on the Sexless Marriage. Her book is available on Amazon.ca : Sex & Health: Why One Can’t Come Without The Other. She is recipient of the Vancouver Board of Trade Community Catalyst Award 2016 and a finalist for YWCA Women of Distinction.
